The Dating Thread

[TheEconomist]

Well, damn, thanks for the help brother!

Like I said, I had all kinds of pictures, that's the only 'staged' one I had. But I definitely understand the douche vibe (I put the picture on Photofeeler) but within the overall context of all my pictures, I think it's offset with, say, me on a jet ski or with my niece/nephew.

I'll get the pictures off my tablet later and post.

But, yeah, go ahead and shred me to pieces, Nissa. I've been a dick to you on a few occasions so here's your chance to get back me and actually do me some good.

Also, probably better to not have a top down selfie angle but straight ahead instead (but not looking directly at camera).

There is a picture limit of 6 and I wanted to use action shots. I had one picture that I briefly thought about using but girls on Photofeeler said it looked feminine so I never used it, lol. It was me hiking in the mountains of Tennessee a few years back. Maybe I need to whip out my softer pictures to offset ... whatever

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What do you think Nissa? Weak, effeminate in an endearing, boyfriend material kind of way or in a childish, grow-the-hell-up kind of way.

Also, the ride isn't new, it's 3 years old. I just take care of my shit

[Visions of Khas]

... Wow.

Anyways. Psych studies show women are more attracted to men who aren't looking directly at them, are engaged with doing something, and are among friends. And smile; the appeal of the brooding look is temporary, while a smile signals openness and hence longer term stability in relationships.

[TheEconomist]

Yeah, my direct eye contact shots always look somewhat intimidating, even to me.

... Wow.

... What?

[Gradius]

I think I've done well online, so here's some of my advice, which, honestly, might be more work than it's worth.

1) Get rid of all selfies. The implication with selfies is that you don't have one friend to take a picture for you, and then when you combine it with a brooding picture it looks like you're sad about your lack of friend. Even just using the timer function on your phone is fine.
2) Use a DSLR. It's stupid, but people associate high quality pictures with high quality people aka models/celebs from magazines.
3) You're a good looking dude but you should get low body fat percentage and become shredded. If you can get cheek hollows, sharp jawline, etc, you will slay.
4) It's all about the pictures. Your main one should be a clear shot of your face, looking away from the camera (that's what all top profiles have in common), none of that far away bullshit where you're an ant in the photo. Then you need a shot that shows you're a social guy, some of you doing sweet hobbies and maybe one (tasteful) body shot. Then you have one with a niece/nephew? Maybe get rid of it. Girls have no clue whose kids those are. But really it's all about the first picture. You want to make sure that one is perfect.
5) On Tinder the description literally doesn't matter. Some stupid one-liner will do fine. On dating sites like okcupid you might want to actually fill it out and give more of a description of what it's like to hang out with you.
6) If you live in a big city, paying for the boost feature isn't the worst idea. Puts you at the top of the swiping list.

And smile; the appeal of the brooding look is temporary, while a smile signals openness and hence longer term stability in relationships.

Even though that's true, I wouldn't use a smiling pic as the main one. Most of the top tinder guys have a brooding pic as their main.

This got deep, real fast.

...I'm trying to think of a clever comment to say from the female perspective, but uh, I got nothin'. But yes, a lack of straightforwardness is a problem. If a guy would just say, "hey, I think you're interesting, wanna go for coffee later?" then that would strip away a lot of problems right there. Instead, guys try and be "cute." Like the time some guy just walked up and asked me to guess where he was from. Though I suppose it was pretty straightforward the time the guy walked up to me and said, "Do you like to drink?" without even asking my name.

Then how come when I open with "hey, want to bang in my car?" it never goes over well?

But in all seriousness I think what you mean is being clear in your intent to date/bang right off the bat, since that eliminates creepiness. Asking them out before ever talking to them though? Bad idea.

I've also bagged should-be models off Miami Beach for years.

You lucky bastard. I spent 3 months there and lived like a god. Now I'm back in Ohio in short fat girl land. :[

Do you still live there?

[Visions of Khas]

I don't know why, but for some reason I thought you were a family man, Grad.

... Wow.

... What?

I'm being an asshole. But then I thought to myself, "We all go through this relationship shit," and decided to stop.

So, some genuine advice on top of Grad's suggestions: your hair in your car photo looks unwashed. I'd recommend a volumizer (yeah, I know, "But muh testosterone!"), or try something different with it altogether. Have you ever styled it? Ask your female friends, or head to a stylist and ask their advice. (I know stylists get bored with their day-to-day; asking advice -- asking someone to talk-- endears them to you. They went into the business to do more than cut hair, so use that resource.)

Also, post yourself doing something you enjoy. Like men, women want to see that you have a life outside Tinder. Don't just cater to the camera; include something you're passionate about. If it's real-estate, then prop your legs up on a desk with books 'n shit, looking care-free. Like hiking? Photo that shit. Like animals? Get some puppy pics -- women melt over dogs. You're more than a face, Econ. You are a human being with aspirations and pleasures. Share them, and you'll have more like-minded chicks checking you out. They sure as hell filter out guys, so filter them in turn.

[Gradius]

I don't know why, but for some reason I thought you were a family man, Grad.

Pfffft, no way. There's a better life out there. :P

[TheEconomist]

You're a good looking dude but you should get low body fat percentage and become shredded.

I have the lowest BMI I know of anyone with my muscle size

Girls have no clue whose kids those are.

The caption, which is almost as big as picture, says they are my niece/nephew. Also, stats mining suggests pictures with kids and animals is a big plus.

I'm being an asshole. But then I thought to myself, "We all go through this relationship shit," and decided to stop.

I'm not going through relationship shit. I'm making a joke about Tinder. I sound hurt or upset but I'm not, just trying to bring humor to this.

So, some genuine advice on top of Grad's suggestions: your hair in your car photo looks unwashed

I guess the mixture of high temperatures, sweatiness and the angle might give that impression. I never noticed it before. I also usually have shorter hair, so I ain't use to fuckin' with it.

And, no, I will never use a volumizer. I should dick slap you for even suggesting it. Again, I tell you: this is a Tinder only problem (in 3 weeks) not a real life problem.

Maybe I'll redo it though when its not so damn hot.

If you can get cheek hollows, sharp jawline, etc, you will slay.

I have all of that

Here's a fucking-around selfie I did at the same time and didn't use for my profile, because I don't really even know why I was tilted that way lol

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I'll see if I can get a decent squared up, face first selfie just for these purposes (not profile). It's hard to do with my tablet, and, again, my phone has shitty quality. Maybe I should get a DSLR.

Also, post yourself doing something you enjoy.

Again, I did. Lots of action shots, jet skis, blah blah. I'm just too lazy to find a way to snippet it off my Tinder app since I don't have digital PC copies, only cloud app versions in dating sites, and tablets are remarkably featureless when it comes to basic PC operations. I don't even think Tinder has a Windows app.

But in all seriousness I think what you mean is being clear in your intent to date/bang right off the bat, since that eliminates creepiness.

Preeeaacchh!!!

I learned young that honest was the key. Whether it's "I'll fuck you right now" or "I actually genuinely want to to get to know," honesty is always the best course of action. The aggressive approach will only work on some and the nice way will only work on some, but the dishonest approach won't work on any girls I want to talk to.

Pfffft, no way. There's a better life out there. :P

Play on playa

You lucky bastard. I spent 3 months there and lived like a god. Now I'm back in Ohio in short fat girl land. :[

Nope, in Tennessee right now, running my business empire. I cannot fucking believe we didn't meet up with each other when you were here. It would have been...

[The_Blade]

I'm glad that most of us have posted pictures here; and I can say I find most of you visually attractive (full homo).

Eco you look very similar to Freespace back in the day! (Quite similar glare)

Selfies in general are a no no. Even having a stranger take you a scenic picture gives up better results IMO.

jet skis

I think this is what they meant by staged pictures.

Anyway, I am Mexican can you guys plz explain more about US date culture? We kind of live with our parents till 35. It's way worse at my city which is better described as a 5M people ranch with conservative views on anything. Example, a friend's girlfriend was cutout from her family for a year for living together with him before marriage. As well, Korean people started to immigrate due to KIA's opening of a factory in Mexico, and I find it amusing how local women stare at Koreans at the market like they have never seen any other Asian in their lives.

So we are all in our 20s?

[TheEconomist]

I think this is what they meant by staged pictures.

There couldn't possibly be any less of a staged picture. It was taken by my dad while I was jumping waves on the beach.

Plus. it's all about competition. You can say selfies are a no-no all yo want but 99% of guys in my area have one selfie picture and that's it. Therefore, I win by default of having something different.

Women can be as picky and indecisive as they want, but, eventually, market forces win over, as always.

Anyway, I am Mexican can you guys plz explain more about US date culture?

I wouldn't describe what Gradius and I are doing as being standard. Most guys don't have the balls to approach a woman, much less however many we do. One must give zero fucks to do this shit and not want to blow your brains out after a few rejections.

But, to answer your question, I really don't know how to explain it. Watch a teen drama. If you ask specifics questions, maybe I can help.

[TheEconomist]

So, I decided to try POF. Seems to be alright, got a lot of likes, lots of messages so far. Most seem legit. No confirmed dates yet, but I'm working on some potential ones. But, there's been some obviously shady shit. Here's one I decided to play around with because this wasn't even subtle in the least, haha. Here it is for your lulz.

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